Nerd Alert #33

Piratebay.org is shut down shocker!

Proof that even the Swedes have copyright law.

Nerd Alert #72

Joss Whedon in message board shocker!

Proof that even famous nerds troll each other’s blogs.

Goldsmith's Two Cents: X-Men 3

X-Men: The Last Stand (2006)

Imagine for a moment that you have at your disposal a nearly unlimited budget with which to make a superhero action movie. Now imagine that one of your main characters is omnipotent and indomitable; her powers allow her to do, quite literally, anything she can imagine. You'd make a pretty sweet movie, don't you think? I know I would. I'd have my almighty demigoddess flying all over the place, creating solar systems with her bare hands, growing armies of mythical creatures to fight by her side, etc.

Well, if you think that's what a Hollywood director would do when presented with this very set of circumstances, you'd be wrong. Instead of showing off the awesome powers of The Phoenix (formerly Jean Grey), director Brett Ratner botched this tremendous opportunity and left me fanaticizing about what could have been one of the coolest moments in superhero-movie history.

If I'd wanted to use my imagination I would have spent that $7 on an old X-Men comic. You blew it, Brett. You blew it.

Classic Moments In Gaming History #14

Despite being billed as an educational game, the only thing I learned from The Oregon Trail is that life is a capricious bitch.

TV Roundup Endgame: Part Zwei

The O.C.: In the shocking season finale, Seth reads Jonathan Strange & Mr. Norrell. It is good to see the producers are doing their homework again. And they finally put Marissa out of her misery (even though going to Greece would have been a perfectly acceptable exit from the show). Sadly, the same can not be said about Jeff Buckley, whose corpse Imogen Heap violently gang-banged during the closing minutes with their atrocious rendition of '"Hallelujah." Can we please put a ban on all further covering of said song during future season finales? k thx.

Survivor XII: So this season wasn't exactly the classic I predicted. After an entertaining (and unpredictable) start, the Casaya tribe finally proved that they had watched Survivor before by pagoning La Mina. Terry looked like he could persevere with a winning combination of Tom's invincibility and Chris's douchebaggery, but came up short in the weakest final immunity challenge of the series. Whatever. Winning Survivor has never been about being remotely likable or even vaguely competent (see every winner ever - but especially Ambore). The jury could have demonstrated a little more moxie, but I guess it is hard to blame them for failing to generate any enthusiasm for the most boring final two of all time (booting Shane and Courtney was not nearly as clever as you thought assholes). Anyway, the moral of the story is that after god-knows how many seasons, Survivor is still compulsively watchable -- and Panama: Exile Island even made me think the a Survivor All-Stars II would be a good idea. And after the last fiasco, that has got to mean something.

No, that's not my trick, Michael.

On Amazon, you can buy both Season 1 and Season 2 of Arrested Development at 50% off. If you purchase them together, you get an addition $10 off.

That is 30 dollars for the funniest 960 minutes of your life.

That is 37.5% of their list price.

You could even buy both sets, and then sell them on Half.com for a profit.

Just looking at quotes brought a small tear to my eye.

[Gob: But I'll tell you what. If you want to use my likeness for a Hamburglar-type character, I'll sign off on that. ‘Mr. Banana Grabber' or something.

Michael: I mean, I guess it would just be a guy who you know, grabs bananas and runs. Or, um, a banana that grabs things. I don't know why. Why would a banana grab another banana? I mean, those are the kind of questions I don't want to answer.]

Selling the cow...

It doesn't give off milk anyway. But, point is, I'm on the cusp of selling my PSP. I put up a post on another website I frequent asking whether I should do it. Whether I should sell my PSP.

Thing is, there aren't any good games on it and there don't seem to be anymore coming. Also, I have no plans on using it as a rearview mirror for the PS3.

I think the system is more or less dead.

Yet, I'm still having a hard time deciding whether or not I should unload the little black paperweight. Thoughts?

The etiquette of thinking

My quick take on television.

The Great Stuff:

The Office really is the best show on television. Period. It’s funny. It’s compelling. It’s “real.” As everyone knows, I could say good things about it all day. So to mix things up, I’m going to make a large criticism: No new episodes until the Fall.

The Sopranos is almost over – as of right now, there are only nine episodes remaining – and it’s as interesting and important as ever. I’m always amazed by the show’s ability to balance a huge cast and still make the stories compelling every week. The Lost writers and producers need to pay closer attention to the Sopranos.

The Good Stuff:

I like My Name Is Earl. The characters. The positive attitude of the show. Still, I don’t know that it will ever be a great show. (Granted, that just means that it might not change the world, like an Arrested Development, but I’d guess it will have a long run in primetime and a longer run in syndication.)

Big Love is fascinating. And remarkably “on” when it comes to its Salt Lake verisimilitude. It did take a few episodes to get going, but the performances by the cast are awesome.

On The Line:

How I Met Your Mother is too sentimental, like I worried it could be. And the more interesting minor characters are still taking a back seat to the bland major characters. But there is still something compelling about it. Although I can’t say what.

The Ugly:

Two and a Half Men suddenly tried having its main characters act like grown-ups. I don’t like it this way. So I stopped watching in January.

The Fugly:

Kolchak. I don’t know when this show died. But I know for me it was about week three. Once Stuart Townsend had shown how much he sucks. And once the show had shown how it was never ever going to be even remotely fun or entertaining.

Over The Hill:

The Simpsons had a pretty good season overall. The Ricky Gervais episode was brilliant. And there were a few bright moments otherwise. It’s hard though. The show has been on for so long and the characters are so iconic that there isn’t much you can do to rock the boat. And yet, it can still make me laugh.

I don’t watch The Family Guy anymore.

Other Thoughts:

I’ve watched more Grey’s Anatomy than I'd care to in my lifetime. And I think it’s only going to get worse in the future.

I hope The Office DVD comes out soon.

My office at work is always cold. I keep a coat around (even in the summer) because it’s that uncomfortable.

E3 2006: What I think about the future...

I just finished my search for my apartment.

[My goal was to have a nice 1 bedroom – girlfriend approved... for the, y’know, future – in the Avenues, Sugarhouse or Downtown by June 1st. This was, obviously, quite new for me. I really had no idea how what to do. But it was one of those things I assume I can figure out since there are many people in the world less educated (and less intelligent?) than me who have been able to do it. (I used the same logic when I was learning how to drive a stick shift... eventually I gave up on that. Manual transmissions are bullshit.)]

So I found one. On 1st Avenue. Less than a half block away from Salt Lake’s famous Mormon Temple (yay?). A block from a light rail station (which means five minutes from school). And two blocks from the nearest Starbucks.

I’m happy about it. You could say it’s been a long time coming, but I’m not really sure about that. I waited until I was financially able to live on my own without too much trouble. My hope is that, even with my newfound rent payment, I won’t be any poorer than I have been living at home. (That might sound impossible... but my move coincides with a 60% increase in my weekly work hours.)

Thing is... I still wonder about money. Especially since I might have some rather expensive purchases to make in the future. (Jewelry can be expensive.)

I’m trying to figure out what I can sell to pull together any extra cash for incidentals like vacuums, trashcans and coffee makers. I have a guitar that likely to go. Along with a random assortment of “collectibles” from my days in the video business.

I’m even thinking about selling all of my old video games and consoles. But there are a few lingering doubts in my mind about whether I’m really to that point in my life... or if I even want to sell my classic systems.

Coincidentally, the dust just settled on E3 2006. For those of you not in the know (and totally confused by our posts a couple weeks ago) that’s the annual video game trade show in Los Angeles. It’s a massive event that fills up the entire L.A. Convention Center and last three days.

Even though I was a big enough video game fan to go to E3 two years ago as a member of the press, it wasn’t a big deal to me this year. I’m officially a casual gamer. (Albeit a casual gamer with an extensive understanding of the industry.) Therefore I don’t think I have much to say about E3 2006. And yet...

Nintendo

Nintendo “won” the show. I was already excited about the Wii. But now... I’ll definitely buy one. That’s saying a lot too, since I don’t know that I’ll ever buy an Xbox 360 or a PS3. The virtual console is a great idea. (And incentive to sell my classic systems now before they’re presumably devalued.) The controller looks awesome and, much like with my current favorite system the DS, shows a lot of potential for compelling and original software.

Microsoft

An obvious second place. I love the idea of the Xbox Live Arcade. I just wish they’d give actual release dates for some of the more interesting games. Otherwise it seems like it’s just solid sailing… in America at least.

Sony

I’m not a big Sony fan to begin with. But this E3 cemented that and essentially cut off any future tie I’ll ever have with their game machines. I would never spend $600 on a console. And there was nothing shown that will keep me from selling my PSP. (It’s on the market now!)

Hmm… it seems like I should have more to say. But I really don’t. I can’t think of a single game from the show that I know I’ll absolutely buy. Save for the stuff I’ve already talked about for the Wii. And, of course, more for DS. The DS is the greatest thing ever.

Maybe I really don’t care anymore.

The Annals of the Unemployed

Today is the two year anniversary of my short-lived Annals of the Unemployed. A vague predecessor to my present blogging, The Annals chronicled the absurdity of my post-collegiate existence to the general amusement of my former housemates. Within a matter of weeks, the Annals would be defunct; a whirlwind romance with its ineffable tenor made the project impracticable. Although the DRTEASE car never made it to print, my initial vertigo after leaving Wesleyan was captured with painful precision.

This particular series documents my woeful odyssey home following graduation. The plan was simple: Jimmy, Jesse, and I were to drive back to Utah using Jesse's car. Camp and hike in Zion. Treasure our last days together. Instead, I would be exiled on Block Island and my friendship with Jesse would be irrevocably destroyed. As I am about to embark on a parallel journal, I thought it was pertinent enough to reprint. And because 'nugless' must never be forgotten. Through the looking glass:

monday, may 24, 12:34 pm. m-town, ct - while waiting to say goodbye to a one jeremy levinn a large suburban pulls up to the one vine parking lot. enter mr. delia. mr. delia pulls me aside. 'listen... i just want you to know jessie's mother and i are very unhappy about this trip. i am not going to let anybody fuck with my daughter's itinerary.' after a minute tirade, i am unceremoniously thrust into the car as it pulls away. unnerved, i begin to cry profusely. after a half and hour, jessie unapologetically lets me know that her dad just needed to express his feelings. turbid, i stare out the car window. it can't get that much worse. that night i watch blue crush.
 
tuesday, may 25, 11:34 am. block island, ri - i emerge from a twelve hour slumber to see jessie on the phone. jimmy rolls his eyes. mr. delia has rescinded his offer to let us use his car for the road trip. he cites an earlier car accident on memorial day weekend as well as rising gas prices. apparently, mr. delia thought these concerns were not important enough to bring up say... anytime earlier than the last possible minute. i am thus marooned forty-five minutes off the east coast with all of my earthly possessions stranded in mr. levison's butterfield a dormicile. i stare out the house windows at the ocean. it can't get that much worse. i open a year-old mountain dew.
 
wednesday, may 26, 3:47 pm. block island, ri - i receive a phone call from my mother. on the way home, delta lost my luggage, including the suitcases carrying all of my clothing. my wardrobe correspondingly decreases to three white undershirts, two boxers, cords, and a pair of sandals. jessie tells me this could be a good time to practice detachment from material objects. i stare at my worn out corduroy pants. it can't get that much worse. 36 hours later i am in new jersey.
 
friday, may 28, 2:40 pm. heart of darkness, nj - citing prior car accident and possible traffic problems, the delias refuse to take me to jfk. instead they abandon me at a jersey train stop. a stranger offers me a donut. it is chocolate. seven and a half hours later i arrive at jfk where my bag of two dirty white shirts is examined for suspicious items.
 
saturday, may 29, 9:47 pm. slc, ut - howard jones' "things can only get better" plays on the radio. seconds later a passing motorist inquires if i have any 'nug' for the 'nugless' while miming the puffing on a joint.
 
monday, may 31, 1:34 pm. slc, ut - delta calls. my suitcases were last seen in san paolo, brazil. brushing a few crumbs off my white t-shirt, i ask if there is any possibility of compensation; perhaps, but it takes between 60 and 90 days to process. furrowing my brow, i scan the room for any traces of nug.

The Starry Sky And Utah Mountain

The results are in.

Utah has apparently decided to celebrate the most insipid event in its short history: the Golden Spike. While a slight improvement over the tedious semiology of the Beehive, the completion of the first transcontinental railroad at Promontory Point is distinct only its historical arbitrariness.

Nevermind the fact that Utah has the most national parks in the country, including Arches National Park with its breathtakingly iconic Delicate Arch. Or Utah's propulsion onto the international scene with the terrifically successful 2002 Winter Olympics. Perhaps the legislature was weary of the radical slogan, "The World Is Welcome."

Honestly Logan. Why Fight It?

LOGANMIX001: Dancing In Heaven

While the rest of you were mourning Cobain's death at candle light vigils, I was fervently downloading 12'' extended remixes of synthpop classics over my 14.4 baud modem. By 1997 I had moved beyond my new romantic fixation, but my friends still took great delight (and probably some muted amusement) in my new wave mixtapes. This particular mix has its origins from a tape called The Different Story - an assorted mixture of overlooked singles and album tracks beyond the standard decade collection fare. Over the years, I have shuffled the tracklisting around a bit, but with a few exceptions (I mean how could I pass over Emilio's theme song?) it still bears that original mission.

The songs are primarily linked by style/genre, but like all new wave hits, they tend to thematically gravitate towards love in its commodified (The Sun Always Shines On TV, Tears Are Not Enough) and unrequited (Send Me An Angel, The Different Story) forms. And about dancing, usually in some sort of celestial body, which I assume is some sort of vague metaphor about love. But who really knows?

A blueprint that says that the boy meets the girl:

1. The Sun Always Shines On TV - A-ha [Hunting High and Low]
2. Dance With Me - Alphaville [Afternoons In Utopia]
3. My Own Way - Duran Duran [Rio]
4. Tears Are Not Enough - ABC [The Lexicon Of Love]
5. The Great Curve - Talking Heads [Remain In Light]
6. Just Another Day - Oingo Boingo [Dead Man's Party]
7. Send Me Angel (Heaven No. 7 Mix) - Real Life [Send Me Angel 12'' Vinyl Single]
8. Love Action (I Believe In Love) - The Human League [Dare]
9. Enola Gay - Orchestral Manoeuvres In The Dark [Organisation]
10. Procession - New Order [Procession/Everything's Gone Green 7'' Single]
11. Strangelove - Depeche Mode [Music For The Masses]
12. It's A Sin - Pet Shop Boys [Actually]
13. Relax (Come Fighting) - Frankie Goes To Hollywood [Welcome To The Pleasuredome]
14. Dancing In Heaven (Orbital Be-Bop) - Q-Feel [Dancing In Heaven 7'' Single]
15. The Different Story (World Of Lust And Crime) - Peter Schilling [The Different Story]
16. Don't You (Forget About Me) - Simple Minds [Don't You 7'' Single]
17. Head Over Heels - Tears For Fears [Head Over Heels 7'' Single]

Drop me a line if you want a copy, or, alternatively, I have included the originating albums if you are all DIY and shit.

TV Roundup Endgame: Part Eine

My Name Is Earl: Okay, I lied. Five months ago, I claimed that My Name Is Earl could ride its formula to Kingdom Come and I would be content. While the show is still as charming and genial as ever, I find myself less and less motivated to watch it. The general moralizing [that is not the right word] structure of each individual episode is certainly getting tiresome, but I think it has more to do with the overall humor of the series. I smile a lot, but I rarely laugh. I will probably continue watching the show in the coming year, but the show could probably benefit from some revamping. Am I alone in this growing disinterest in Earl Hickey?

The Office: We all know that Mark has been championing [a href=every Mark post ever/a] The Office since the beginning (except for the pilot - which I feel like I should re-watch for contrast) and, you know, for the most part I have been humoring him. Surely an American remake of a flawless British series couldn't possibly be that good. I repent! Looking back on the 2005-2006 television year, I cannot think of a show that I more looked forward to seeing each week. The character dynamics are so sharp, and the interactions so subtle; while the hand-held camera makes the show look effortless, those actors are operating on so many emotional registers - Carrell best of all. The clincher: Jim's unconscious revelation at the tail-end of the Drug Testing episode of the symmetry between his relationship with Pam, and Dwight's connection with Michael [which of course speaks to so many larger issues of gendered and platonic interrelations, but I will spare you the academic posturing as it would do such a disservice to the show's incredibly light touch].

And then there was the season cliffhanger. What a gutsy call. Probably the biggest deviation from the British series. Personally, I would have preferred some more source fidelity (that one scene between Pam and Jim was gut-wrenchingly perfect), but what do I know?

Sidenote: NBC is throwing down the gauntlet next year. Thursdays are going to be loaded with not only My Name Is Earl and The Office, but also Sorkin's [who pretty much started the non-laughtrack trend] new series Studio 60 on the Sunset Strip. It looks promising and NBC must have confidence in the show as they are placing it in next year's most heating time slot: opposite Grey's Anatomy, CSI, and The O.C.. NBC's flagship night was usurped, and now they are fighting back.

Netflix Two Cents: Junebug

Junebug (2005)

Verdict: Tonally perfect. Understated, textured, ambigious. Like a Wes Anderson film, but without all of the preciousness. And it has Yo La Tengo! And a McKenzie stash!

Product Review, In Brief III

Product: Tab Energy

Judgement: An online sage once said this beverage tasted like, and I quote, 'butthole.' I cannot disagree, but might I suggest the adjective chalky in addition to his incisive noun.

Lost Lost...

I’m finally caught up... well... mostly.

I missed the episode where Michael came back. (I think my DVR is programmed to save only five episodes of any given series. Why it decided to delete that episode instead of the oldest is as yet undetermined.) And I haven’t watched the last ~5 minutes of Eko’s lecture to Locke on the importance of being a Sisyphean hero in the most recent episode. (Soon, I’m sure, the monitoring station will kick into effect and we’ll be treated to a glimpse of either the “heroes” of the show or the others. That’s, at least, my prediction of right now.)

Thing is, Lost has... well... lost me.

I think that I know why too. I just can’t keep up.

I like the cast. I like the “tailies.” I like a lot about the show. But after two years of flashbacks, mythology and new characters entering faster than old characters can be killed... there’s just too much now. And I’m having a difficult time remembering (and therefore caring about) what’s going on.

This situation is new to me. Back when I had more mental energy for things like television (pre-Graduate school and pre-Rachel) I had no problem tracking mythology for my favorite shows. For example, I could remember minute details from season one of Buffy the Vampire Slayer when they were reintroduced in season four.

I don’t (or can’t) do that anymore. Especially after the regular post-February, pre-May hiatus and my own I’m-too-busy-with-school hiatus.

Point is: Lost needs to simplify... or they’re going to lose me forever.

Wrong Is The New Right

According to old crazy eyes himself, despite all the touring this summer, the new Radiohead won't be coming out until early next year. You can rest easy though as Thom Yorke has an [not 'solo' mind you - oh Thom you card!] album coming out on July 11. The Eraser was produced by Nigel Godrich meaning that it will probably be vastly more interesting than the Radiohead album proper [oh god, am I going to be eating those words later]. Cool cover art at least. That Massive Attack album also sounds like it now has a 2007 release date, so you know, like, whatever.

In other news, the new Primal Scream record leaked, and despite not being the total disaster I had envisioned, I can't imagine listening to it ever again. The new Annie single "The Crush" also managed to find its ways onto my computer; somewhere in the past year or so Annie apparently turned from Stacey Q into The Go-Gos.

This is not going to be a very agreeable music year for me.

Kittens...

(We have a “museum” wall where we hang up pictures, ads and art that we find inspirational. Of course, right now it’s mostly just pictures of kittens. We like kittens.)

The Remains Of The Day

I woke up this morning to the insistent buzzing of my cellphone. Grumpy and disoriented, I stumbled into my living room only to discover that my cellphone had multiplied - where once there was one, there were five or six. Immediately sizing up the situation, as one who is dreaming can so readily do, I set about to waking myself. For me, this usually involves opening my eyes as wide as possible, hoping, I gather, to trigger some corresponding effect in the waking world. Upon finally waking, I stumbled into my living room, grumpy and disoriented, only to find the screen of my computer monitor peeling from its frame. Frustrated, I set out once again, expanding my eyelids in an exaggerated manner.

As Freud has become synonymous with the unconscious, it seems almost injudicious to couch his psychoanalytical discourse in the trajectory of Enlightenment thought. Yet his Interpretation of Dreams is a positivist work of the most insidious nature: the reduction of the last bastion of Romantic thought - the dream world - to concise scientific formula. Or as Freud wrote, "What animals dream of I do not know. There is a proverb, mentioned to me by one of my students, which claims to know, for it asks the question: What does a goose dream of? and answers: Corn. The entire theory that the dream is a wish-fulfilment is contained in these two sentences." Even my bizarre, labyrinthine dream, while distorted in the veil of the remains of the day, stemmed from simple wish-fulfillment: having read Freud's Interpretation of Dreams I set about to undermine his theory by dreaming my way into disrupting my own dreams - perhaps to even prevent myself from discovering the true nature of my unconscious desires!

Or something like that. Freud was more adept at twisting dreams through his counter-intuitive psychoanalytical apparatus than I am - usually with something sexual, no matter how oblique the connection, underpinning the entire interpretation. In the explication of one of his own dreams, it is the word trimethylamine which bafflingly triggers a sexual aetiology to the whole endeavor. Ticking clocks, chemical compounds, train stations - for Freud, it all leads back to the sexual somehow.

This is quite an elaborate exposition for very little pay off.

At a holiday party a few years ago, I was describing to some friends how I was having a reoccurring problem with my sex dreams. Right before the explicit act, something would occur, derailing the entire dream. If all dreams emanate from wish-fulfillment surely there was a reason for such ego interference. My friend Matt commiserated:

MATT: "I totally have that same problem. Last night I dreamt that I was doing calculus with Pamela Anderson and Jenna Jameson... And we totally got it on!"

LOGAN: "That doesn't sound anything like my dream."

MATT: "Oh yeah. You're right!"

Spellbound

I have this terrible cerebral blind spot when it comes to the word bureaucracy. Even after studying the letters intently for a couple of minutes, I still cannot manage to spell it correctly. It took me 14 tries this afternoon:

burecracy
bureuocracy
bureauocracy
burueacracy
burocracy
beurearocracy
bueurocracy
bureauocracy
buereuocracy
burueaocracy
beuocracy
bureauocracy
bueaurocracy

Hopefully this embarrassing post will cure my terrible affliction. Anybody else have an orthographic nemesis?

[I just spent a half-hour on Wikipedia trying to find the appropriate word and I still don't know if I got it right - but damn linguistics is the coolest thing ever. I want to be able to tell people that I study epenthesis and phonotactics. Or allomorphy and morphosyntax. Did you know that not all Chinese characters are radical-phonetic compounds? Because I surely didn't!]

E3: Halo-limination

What can I say...

E3: Retaliation

OMG. Zelda at Launch. Reggie is my hero.

Down Is The New Up

Over the weekend, Radiohead premiered possible songs off their forthcoming album in Kopenhagen. New song titles include '15 Step', 'Bangers 'n Mash', 'Spooks', 'Arpeggi', 'Open Pick' & 'House of Cards'. The At Ease message boards are swarming with unbearable Radiohead fans desperately trying to encode and decipher Thom Yorke's typically inscrutable lyrics. Not that I can really judge; back in 2002 at the zenith of my interest in the band, I could be found downloading FLAC bootlegs (lossless zealots are the worst) of their concerts in Basque country hoping to get a good sense of their new material. As many of you know, Hail to the Thief pretty much annihilated any interest I had in the band. While history and many of my friends don't seem to agree with me yet, I still hold it is as the most insufferable Radiohead album [although to be fair, Amnesiac is my personal favorite, so feel free to mock my music taste].

I am, however, curious to see what the band has up their collective sleeves. I was up at 10am on Saturday [morning], anxiously awaiting tickets to go on sale through the fiendish Ticketmaster. Beyond the ridiculous price gouging (service fees added up to approximately 27% of the total purchase), Ticketmaster gives you no preparation for what to expect when tickets go on sale. At 10:00:06 I was confounded by the radial option of either premium or standard tickets with nary an explanation of what these terms meant. Of course, since tickets sold out in less than a minute, I didn't have time to ponder the situation, so I picked one at random and crossed my fingers. Somehow the fates blessed me with an Orchestra level seat at the most gorgeous venue in Chicago - but surely there must be a better method than Ticketma($$)ter [dollar signs added for maximum effect - ed.]?

Radiohead isn't the only band that will be gracing us with a new album this year. A few tidbits on some of my other favorite artists:

Junior Boys: Although it name checks Žižek, this preview of the new Junior Boys album So This Is Goodbye sent my heart aflutter - just read the Goldfrapp analogy. While the "the removal of rhythmic tricksiness" has me a little concerned (Dark and Greenspan parted ways prior to the completion of Last Exit), "Teach Me How to Fight" and "When I'm Not Around" demonstrated that they can thrive without the skitter-beats.

Annie: MTV (of all places) reports that Annie is already hard at work again, this time paring up with The Smashing Pumpkin's James Iha - who did a fine remix of "Me Plus One" - as well as 80's throwback remixers Richard X and Alan Braxe. Annie simply doesn't work in a live setting (sorry Intonation!), but damn do I like the sound of the "new songs [being] more club-oriented — still '80s-sounding." Her DJ-Kicks album is pretty solid too, in case you missed it (check out the Alan Braxe and Fred Falke remix of DFA1979's "Black History Month" for evidence as to why she picked him as a producer).

The Rapture: "W.A.Y.U.H." leaked and it is just aching for a Phones 12'' extended remix. Brilliant - but you know I am biased.

Primal Scream: Well that is too bad. After two blistering albums and a slight mistep, Primal Scream seem to be returning to the Give Out But Don't Give Up era that everybody agreed we would be better off forgetting. Lead off single "Country Girl" is depressingly disappointing. While I am severly cautious about Riot City Blues [oh god...], I am intrigued by the inclusion of back up vocals of Alison Mosshart from The Kills. Perhaps she can inject some much needed vitrol into the flagging band?

DJ Shadow: Not much to say, but you can check out DJ Shadow's "3 Freaks" off his website. Loved The Private Press, and would really like to see him play stateside.

Massive Attack: No new news on Weather Underground, but the Hollywood Bowl has Massive Attack and TV on the Radio booked for September 24. What a cool venue - I am constantly impressed by the acts they pull in every summer. Hopefully, this means a larger tour with TV on the Radio opening and backing the band. And I totally called the Eilzabeth Fraser/Coachella happening. All is forgiven dear if you suit up with 3D and the gang this fall.

E3: Revelation

HAHAHA. Mark they finally found a suitable use for the PSP - as a rear view mirror for your PS3 games!

$599. Innovative 'Six Degrees Of Movement' Controller. GG SONY.

Finally...

A simple consumer request...

I think there should be butterscotch M&M's.

Maybe half and half. Butterscotch and chocolate. That'd be a good mix.

Don't you think?

Paraphrasing Porn Perspectives

Somehow I doubt any of you had this in your BA thesis:

"Adult producer Mark Cromer writes in The Nation in 2001 of the industry's anxiety over the then-newly-elected Bush administration. In an effort to prevent 'any potential anti-porno jihad by the Bush Administration,' some of the biggest players, eager to 'sanitize' their product, created a set of guidelines for producers that would ban a set of sexual acts and scenarios that some consider staples of the genre such as bukakke."

Kudos kid. You did good.

OK Computer II

(Frame.)

Did I ever tell you about the time I called customer support because I couldn't get my computer to turn on?

Well, I did.

I'm on the phone with the guy and he's like, "try holding down the power button for ten seconds," and all this other crap. And he’s asking me, "so what was the last thing you were doing before it stopped working?"

(Tense change.)

I said, "I was on the Internet looking for an apartment."

“And your computer just turned off?” he said.

“Yeah,” I said. “My computer just turned off.” It was like the third time he’d asked that.

(Tone change.)

Finally, he was all like, “well, I don’t know what to say. Can you see if the power cord is plugged into the back of your computer and into the wall.”

And I was like, “No.”

And he was like, “Why not?”

And I was like, “Dude, because the power’s out!”

It’ll make you go blind...

Add one more strike to the list. The Wall Street Journal and the Associated Press are reporting that new research shows that PDAs, iPods, portable game machines and computer monitors can cause severe eyestrain and permanent damage. (In other words, masturbation, staring at the sun, playing your DS or watching your video iPod can all make you go blind.)

So that means that electronics now ruin three of the five senses. They make you go deaf. They ruin your sense of touch. And now they make you go blind.

Can smell and taste be far behind?

El mundo esta de pie

It is always delightful when one's birthday falls admits a cluster of exciting events. I remember when all my friends and I went to the debut of Jurassic Park in 5th grade: it was the COOLEST birthday ever. While Sam Neill is nowhere to be seen in 2006, June 11 is set to be a rocking good time. The third season of the best-written show currently on television, Entourage, will be premiering on my birthday, but as great as it will be to have E and crew back in my life, the HBO comedy is going to be eclipsed by the commencement of the World Cup on June 9th [did you think I was going to be raving about my own commencement?]. Although it will be hard to match the delirious exhilaration of when USA went up 3:0 against Portugal in Game 1 of the 2002 tournament.

Honestly, I don't even know why I am such a zealot for America when it comes to football - it was probably an emotional reaction after studying abroad added to the fact that "soccer" is still relatively unwatched in North America. Given that the United States failed to qualify between 1950 and 1990, and ranked last among the field in 1998, it seems like the one remaining arena where you can root for the old red, white, and blue without feeling like a complete asshole. Plus, Kasey Keller is badass - he was my inspiration when our intermural team went unvictorious during the 2004 season.

Team USA's schedule for the first round in Group E:










I feel like Jesus at Christmas time.