Like The Deserts Miss The Rain

Uncharted 3: Drake's Deception
At an absurdly brisk 8 hours (and even that is rather generous), Uncharted 3 stretches the definition of what constitutes a "game release." I wasted more time in Skyrim staring at loading screens than it took for the semi-tucked Nathan Drake to finish his latest adventure.

The length in and of itself isn't a problem, but the barely-stitched together plot, recycled emotional notes, and tedious gun fights places this about on par with the typically unimaginative Hollywood sequel. (Naughty Dog: "What if Drake has to fight five… no six guards all at once!")

Perhaps the incongruent and superfluous aquatic sequence - Drake is kidnapped, placed aboard a cruise liner, which he blows up, only to conveniently wash ashore at the same place he was taken - is a metaphor for the game as a whole: a rushed cash-grab before the seventh console generation ship completely sinks.

Cheerio, I guess.

Grade: B-