I love smoking

Cigarettes are fantastic. I love the entire process. The box they are packaged in. The way it fits in your pockets. Pulling one from the lineup. Lighting. Then blowing the smoke. It's so satisfying. So fun. And elegant. You are never alone when you've got a cigarette in your hand. You're no longer waiting or sitting there without purpose. You're smoking. I hate that cigarettes have such a bad rap.

And I hate that you can't smoke in a movie theater. What a crime. There are few places where I would rather smoke. You're in a comfortable chair, in the dark, for a couple of hours. Come on! How satisfying would it be to light up in that situation? Mmmmm.... What a shame.

And in the newsroom. That place just begs to be filled with a cloud of smoke. Man oh man, what a stupid world we live in when I can't light up at my desk while I'm laboring over a story about a guy who died in some terrible car accident. Now all we have is Redbull--which is great--but not the same.

Why don't they make cigarettes that arent so bad for you? I mean, seriously. It can't be all that hard to come up with a less harmful smoke. It would save the industry. Profits would be back up to pre-war on cig levels. Everybody loves smoking, people just don't like to die. It seems obvious to me.